I just wanted to tell you what my trauma was and see if maybe you have any trauma around food too. Is this something that you might be struggling with? And if so, maybe just thinking about it might make you go, "Oh, yeah."

The weekly Confidence Warrior Anthem is here!

*Trigger warning* Abuse in a relationship When I was 17 and homeless I dated a 30-year-old man who abused me for two years. In this video and blog post, I shared what it's like to be in an abusive relationship, how it related to my low self-esteem, and how you can help someone who is in that situation.

The weekly Confidence Warrior Anthem is here!

Last year Americans spent $66 billion dollars on trying to become thinner. What if we spent less time, money and energy on the pursuit of thinness and instead focused on the things that actually matter? What if we could learn to love our bodies exactly as they are today? Fat, thin, tall, short, mullet-sporting or leopard print thong wearing; we are all worthy and fabulous.

A week before my TEDx Talk my Dad was discovered dead in his home.

I have a video on YouTube “Are You Fatphobic and Don’t Know It?”.

The dislikes on the video far outweigh the likes. Obviously, right?! When a fat person talks about fatphobia the trolls come out to play.

Before I was body positive, the thought of being in a bikini ANYWHERE was terrifying. Never mind in a public space...never mind dancing...never mind being filmed. Doing something like that would be unfathomable, impossible, terrifying.

"Should you be eating that much food?" - Your Mother

"New Year, New You! Time to get that bikini body!" - Dumb advertisement

"Oh, you've put on weight!" - Weird Uncle Keith

In our society fat is seen as bad. Being fat is worse than someone who doesn’t indicate while changing lanes, worse than being a bad tipper, worse than being someone who tries to get on the train before you get off. Why is this? Why is fat demonized? I was determined to find out!

I surveyed 100 people on their views on fatness and the results were incredibly interesting

1.     Start with things that are easy

2.     Go somewhere you’re familiar with

3.     Soak in the atmosphere

4.     Don’t push yourself too hard (try to have fun!)

5.     Once you’re feeling more confident, take it to the next level

One of the badass members of my private Facebook group got shamed by a stranger in the grocery store.

"I just went to the store for lunch and picked up a bag of chips. A lady I've never met before felt it was appropriate to say "you don't need that" as I put them in my hand basket."

BITCH, WHAT?!

Confidence can be haaard. My confidence used to be in the pits of the Mariana Trench and when I was there I could see no way out, even if intellectually I knew I should “just feel better”. Check out these five things that really helped me increase my self confidence (in my mind and my body) and maybe they’ll help make you realise how freaking badass you are too!

Hello. I am fat. I have been fat from as young as I can remember, also from as young as I can remember, I have known that being fat is bad.

I have just come back from 2 weeks of sun, sand and sangria, my first big vacation all on my lonesome.

Before I left for Mexico my inner critic was loud and proud telling me I was about to embark on a disaster, a lonely, sad time away and I should just stay home.

I got an excellent question from a reader:

"I need to lose weight due to health reasons. Partly because I have thyroid-issues, but also because I am on certain medications that lead to fluid retention that is worsened due to my size.HOW IN THE WORLD do I strive towards being body positive, stopping the dieting-bullshit and accepting myself, WHILST trying to lose weight?!"

I always got the impression my partner of 6 years just wasn’t that into me. Let me re-phrase, just not that into my looks. My suspicion was confirmed 4 years in when he told me that he didn’t find me as attractive because I had put on a little weight. Walking in the park at winter when he shamefully told me his secret, I assured him I would “become better”, I would lose weight.

• I am a fraud, I hate my body.
• I am lucky I have a boyfriend the way my body is, I'm surprised he can stomach looking at me.
• I am always looking at people online, comparing myself to them and knowing I don't measure up.
• When I am introduced to new people I know they are thinking "she is ugly and fat".
• I think I am going to get fired from my job any day now, they will realise hiring me was a mistake.
• I would look so much better if I just lost weight, I hate myself that I can't.
• My partner says I am beautiful, but he is just saying that to be nice.
• I am not worthy.

We all have a pesky inner critic that tells us that we don’t measure up; we aren’t good enough, not worthy of the love we have in our lives, not beautiful…enough.

How the heck do we deal with this seemingly ever present Beelzebub?

I’m very liberal and support the movement, but find myself dictated by conventional standards anyways. What are your opinions on this?