How to be a Good Fatty From Your Bad Fatty Friend

Society has a hella lot of rules for us, especially women. Shame is used to control women and what’s a better way to do it than through policing our bodies. Yay!

 

If you’re a fatty like me, you can try to blend into the background though and be a “good fatty”.

 

A good fatty is a fat person who knows that their fatness is a moral failing and is doing everything they can in their power to be thin, showing that they know they are a bad person, or make up for their horrendous fatness in another way.

There is nothing wrong with being a good fatty or a bad fatty or any kind of fatty for that matter. I wanted to show you how I used to think when I was a saintly good fatty and how I live now I am a devilish bad fatty.

Being a BAD FATTY!

Being a BAD FATTY!

 

How to be a good fatty:

 

Be on a diet, forever

When I was a good fatty I knew I was an embarrassment to society and would starve myself, eating only dust and celery to show people in my life that I “got it”, I knew I was fat and that fat is very much BAD. I would make sure people in my life knew that I knew that being fat was not acceptable and I was doing something about my “problem”.

 

Bad fatty alternative

Fuck. That. Shit. As a bad fatty, not only am I not on a diet, I eat bad fatty foods like pizza and ice-cream in public (OH THE HORROR!). I eat whatever food that my brain and body fancies, whether that be corndogs or corn on the cob. Also I wear clothes with pictures of food on just to show the world there is no shame in my bad fatty food game.

 

Exercise to punish your bad fatty body

Exercise is a great way to get in an extra dose of guilt and body shame! There’s no better way to start a morning than forcing yourself to perform an exercise you hate just to punish yourself for eating that slice of tiramisu last night. And don’t worry if you’re injured, you need to push through that because no pain means no gain gurl. Yeeehaw! Soul destroying motivation all round!

 

Bad fatty alternative

How about moving your body because it brings you joy and pleasure? WEIRD I KNOW! What about having movement in your life because you really want to dance naked to Beyoncé songs in your bedroom? Or you can just not move at all, after all it’s your body and your choice.

 

Bad fatty refusing to diet

Bad fatty refusing to diet

Cover that shit up

As a good fatty you must be very ashamed of your body. You must never expose too much flesh because female sexuality when it’s in the form of a fat body is obscene. But don’t worry girl, because when you’ve shed your bad fat body and have a good thin body you can show as much of your skin as you want and society will praise you….or call you a slut. Either way it’s a win, win situation!

 

Bad fatty alternative

I wear what makes me feel fabulous and if that means a goddamn bikini at the beach, alongside my inflatable donut floatie then YAS QUEEN, I'll be looking fierce. If someone tells me something is inappropriate to wear I tell them to mind their own damn business. I don’t care who sees my fat body because it is fabulous daaarling.

Bad fatty not giving a fuck

Bad fatty not giving a fuck

 

Better be hilarious

As a good fatty I knew I had to make up for my fatty ways by being a better human in everyway possible. I strived to be the funniest person in the room as well as the smartest and highest achieving. My crime after all was worse thing a human could do, riiight? Oh it’s not? But that’s what society tells us.

 

Bad fatty alternative

What I never realized was that I was funny, smart, kind AND gorgeous. I didn’t have to work on being better in those other areas to make up for my hideous appearance. Now I have honed my bad fatty self perception I might just be the hottest chick on the block!

Bad fatty with buff boyfriend

Bad fatty with buff boyfriend

 

Expect and accept mediocrity

As a good fatty it was a great idea for me to accept any affection I could get my sweaty fat hands on. I mean, I was lucky a guy even spoke to me, never mind showed romantic interest in me. The man who could stomach being seen with me in public was a kind hearted and charitable man, definitely a keeper! Don’t mind about him being a complete dick/emotionally abusive/bad person, that’s all I, as a good fatty, deserved.

 

Bad fatty alternative

Whaaaaaaat?! Now I am a bad fatty I know that I am a goddess and there are many, many men out there who would dream to go on a date with me, who are gorgeous, hilarious, charming and are achingly proud that I am a bad fatty. How do I know? I got me one already.

 

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Victoria is a Confidence and Body Love Coach at BAM POW LIFE. Learn how you can be exceptional at whatever you turn your hand to with free advice by signing up here. Read more articles, and get access to her FREE eCourse "Extreme Confidence Makeover" here.